Woe is Me

Stuffy nose. A vague fuzzy, humming in my ears. Sinuses that feel like they're packed with wet cement. A painfully red nose. Headache. Muscle ache. Sore throat. Chills.

The cold and flu season is my bane this year.

I wash my hands. I had my flu shot. I take my vitamins. I even regularly disinfected my desk and keyboard at work.

I've had the flu -- twice. It made at least a couple of laps at our house. Now Monkey Dude and I both have killer colds.

Misery, thy name is GeekGoddess.

As much as I'd like to, I can't call in sick this week. I'm taking next week off, and I hope and pray that I'm well by then. I have a document due tomorrow that MUST get done before I leave.

It feels all the worse to me because before I came back to a regular 9-5 gig, I was healthy. When I was freelancing, I went years without severe colds or flu. One year back in an office and I've been sick more than I can count.

An excellent argument for more telecommuting.

Always Look on the Bright Side of Death (Warmed Over)

WARNING: Long pissing, moaning, and whining post ahead... with a happy ending.

It's a phrase my family used to use if someone looked very tired or sick, "Oofta! You look like death warmed over!" Its usage was so common, that I never really considered how horribly dark that statement was until I was much older.

Today, along with the rest of the NerdPod, I feel like death warmed over.

Why?

1. Tomorrow begins our last run of Sound of Music. Six performances in a row. Last week it was five followed by two days off. Great people. Lots of fun. But after several months of rehearsals and almost 20 performances spanning five months, I'm running out of steam.

2. Big projects at work sucking up all available brain power. By the time I finish up an hour of commute and 8 hours of work each day, I'm absolutely mentally drained.

3. Monkey Dude's rehearsals for his play keep us hopping in the short period between leaving work and getting to the theater for our own show AND on the days we don't have a performance. Last night's dress rehearsal went past 1130pm.

4. Adventure Girl has a life, too. We've had to juggle her school commitments, as well as plan a social calendar for her when Monkey Dude isn't available. We owe Adventure Girl's friend's parents for all the sleepover invites that have accomodated our hectic schedule.

5. Round and round it goes sickness. We've hardly gone a week in the past two months without someone in the family having some version of flu, cold, or just plain exhaustion-induced ickiness.

6. Health issues of close and distant family has had me worried. It wears on the psyche.

7. Avindair's work has been a constant source of irritation, like a rabid weasel in one's underwear.

7. All work and no play has made Jill a grumpy bitch goddess. Each day, for months, has been jam-packed with have-to's from before sun up to after sun down. My juggling act is suffering as all but the most important red, bouncy balls get dropped.

There is some good, though. To drop a cliche, there is a light at the end of the tunnel. A few of them, in fact.

1. By this time next week, there are no commitments on our calendar for the next few months.

2. A hectic day will mean going to work and running a few errands on the way home.

3. We're both taking some time off over Spring Break when the kids are out of school. We are not going away. We are not going on a vacation. We're staying home. Get up when we feel like it. Do some projects around the house that have been nagging at us. Getting things accomplished for US, not for someone else.

4. We'll have time to be social again. Invite friends over to watch a movie or play games.

5. We'll be able to eat dinner as a family and spend time together again.

6. It's Spring! The weather is warming up. Now we can take walks by the lake after work and maybe the trails at Elm Creek on weekends. I had my first walk-around-the-building at work today after months!

7. I'll have the energy to exercise in the morning, like I've been wanting to.

8. We've made some new friends with Sound of Music and hope to nurture some of those friendships past the final curtain.

9. We got our foot in the door at a remarkable community theater. It's great to be back on stage, and once we've rested up, we'll be auditioning again... later. *grin*

10. St Patrick's Day the whole family gets to see Gaelic Storm!

I know it's another cliche, but it fits. Sometimes you can't see the forest for the trees. I'm weary beyond belief today and don't quite know how we're going to make it through the week. I had to scramble up a veritable old oak and get some perspective before I lost all hope.

It didn't give me the rest of a full night's sleep, but it did help quell some of the frustration. I'll just play the last scene of Monty Python's The Life of Brian in my head and remember these important words:

Some things in life are bad,
They can really make you mad,
Other things just make you swear and curse,
When you're chewing life's gristle,
Don't grumble,
Give a whistle
And this'll help things turn out for the best.
And...

Always look on the bright side of life.
[whistle]
Always look on the light side of life.
[whistle]

If life seems jolly rotten,
There's something you've forgotten,
And that's to laugh and smile and dance and sing.
When you're feeling in the dumps,
Don't be silly chumps.
Just purse your lips and whistle.
That's the thing.
And...

Always look on the bright side of life.
[whistle]
Always look on the right side of life,
[whistle]

For life is quite absurd
And death's the final word.
You must always face the curtain with a bow.
Forget about your sin.
Give the audience a grin.
Enjoy it. It's your last chance, anyhow.
So,...

Always look on the bright side of death,
[whistle]
Just before you draw your terminal breath.
[whistle]

Life's a piece of shit,
When you look at it.
Life's a laugh and death's a joke it's true.
You'll see it's all a show.
Keep 'em laughing as you go.
Just remember that the last laugh is on you.
And...

Always look on the bright side of life.
Always look on the right side of life.
[whistle]
[repeat and fade out]

Public Service

I'm officially sick and tired of being sick and tired. To help myself and readers of this blog, I'm presenting this handy-dandy frustration relief kit. It's not illegal, won't rot your liver, and if you do it right, will result in a temporary, but blissful lack of consciousness.


Thanks to The Crazy Website.

What a Monday

This past weekend was a productive one in the Nerd Clan household. It was our daughter's 11th birthday. My parents came 'round to redecorate her room into one a little more "mature". The bubblegum pink walls were covered in a muted green. Grown-up, floor-length curtains covered the windows. All of the little girl toys went to one of three places: keepsake storage, giveaway box, or the garbage.

Sunday was spent finishing up a few odds and ends, but it was mostly restful and quiet.

Monday started relatively well. The brand-new 11-year-old was staying home with a cold, and Avindair was going to stay home with her.

"We'll snuggle on the couch and watch movies," he said. "It'll be a nice father-daughter day."

In my rush to get ready for work, Avindair offered to let me take his car. The one with the heated front seats.

"It'll be a treat. I'll even run out and get it warmed up for you."

Minutes later he came back in... an edge to his voice."Someone smashed our passenger side window."

Crap.

I threw on my shoes and ran out to the car. It was smashed in, all right. With a blank space on the windshield where our 2-month old portable GPS used to be. Nothing else was touched.

Our insurance company, Geico, was fantastic. One phone call and they made an appointment for a glass company to come out today and fix it in our driveway.

The police came to make a report. It was a little bit of a relief to find out that we weren't alone. Four home in our neighborhood got hit that they knew of so far. No one suspected until this morning. The NerdHound didn't even wake up. Of course, we're so used to the sounds of teenagers roaming the streets at all hours of the night (even though our suburb has a curfew), that I suppose we've become accustomed to a certain level of noise. At least we could take some comfort in the fact that we weren't singled out.

What now? Tony's father-daughter sick day has turned into "fix things and make the house secure" day.

1. An electrician is coming out today to install motion-detection lighting on the garage. We had our lights on, but according to the police, the motion-detection lights are a great deterrent for any future problems.

2. 1-800 Got Junk is coming out to haul away our remodeling refuse so that the cars can go back in the garage.

3. The auto glass place is coming to fix the car window.

One good thing, we were able to provide the police with the serial number for the GPS. If the thieves try to sell it at a pawn shop, we might be able to piss on their day just a little bit, too.

Now all we need to do is put signs around the house reading, "TRESPASSERS WILL BE SHOT". You think the neighbors will object?

Weary

The number one word to describe me right now. Just plain weary.

It's the everyday things that are getting to me. The routine, the mess, the deadlines, the to-do list. The kinds of things that every person on this planet has to do every day - but eventually your soul has just had enough and you need a break.

I don't see that break coming any time soon.

Like a lot of people, I wake to the alarm, hit the snooze a few times, shuffle out of bed, fail to eat a good breakfast, and head off to work.

I try to ignore the everyday-life flotsam covering my desk, our kitchen counter... the floor boards of my car. I don't have the time or the initiative to deal with it. I'm on the treadmill with my shoe laces untied. Eventually, I'm going to trip.

Didn't take a real vacation this year because of repeated work woes. Haven't even been successful in planning a weekend getaway and I don't see that happening any time soon. Mostly because I just don't have the energy to deal with the headache it takes to plan and execute a vacation.

I am weary.

I wish I could be one of those sparkling people that gets up at the break of dawn with a spring in their step and a smile on their face. The kind of person that has a place for everything... and everything in it's place... and because of that doesn't worry like the rest of us.

Sometimes I wish I could be the kind of person who didn't give a rat's ass about anything. But that's just not within me.

Or maybe be the kind of person whose life is so simple, so uncomplicated, that issue never comes up.

Truth is, the same things that bring complexity and headaches also bring facination and laughter and challenge and love -- and those are things that I wouldn't... couldn't do without. What I could probably use is two full weeks off. The first week to play catch up and do all the things I'd like to get done - because I couldn't enjoy week two looking at the to-do's around me. The last week to just enjoy a week of nothing but getting up, taking a walk, reading, cooking a good meal, ignoring work and emails and phones, puttering around the yard, being with my family, not running to catch up with my life.

Hell, everyone has trouble just dealing with life from time to time. That's where I am today, but at least I have some of it behind me. I did manage to get up, get ready, write a whiny blog post and get my kids off to school. Now for the rest of the day.