I'm a professional writer and editor by trade. In the past, I underestimated the value of my knowledge of the English language. I thought that everyone knew how to write. How did I have anything special to offer?
Then I see something like this in my hometown newspaper:
"Man fleas cops on 5-horsepower cycle"
Please. Tell me I didn't just read that. Tell me this headline didn't make it past the proofers and the editors and the printers.
At my front door today, a local company that replaces driveways and sidewalks left a flyer with this dandy quote at the bottom:
"Call now to schedule an appointment for a FREE consolation."
Excuse me? A free WHAT? I didn't know people usually charged for that these days. What do they do? Put an arm around your shoulder and say, "Gee, I'm sorry your driveway looks so crappy. We can help fix it. No charge for the consolation." Perhaps I should call and offer a consultation on their advertising in trade for a new driveway?
4 comments:
But you missed the point!
"Man Fleas" is a local wood-bee superhero in the wilds of (your hometown), and he was simply explaining about his environmentally-friendly 5hp FleaMobile.
Personally, I think "Man Fleas" is one of Bag Dude's nemesisisisisis.
Could it just be that they are male fleas that happen to be cops?
Thanks for the laugh, guys. My updates to this website relaunch for a major corporation today are a NIGHTMARE. No joke. This is bad.
I need a drink.
But hey! Instead of a drink you'll get to go pump iron with me tonight! Whee! Ain't that a blast?
Running now...
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